It’s all changed.

It’s all changed. As I write this blog post the house is silent. No small people to entertain, no park to stand at freezing my bum off, just silence. It’s going to take some getting used to, that’s for sure. You see I have given my body and my energy entirely to the girls for the past 6 years. Pregnancies, breastfeeding and it all over again without a break. And then with lockdown 1,2 and 3 we’ve spent more time together than ever before. It’s a transition we were already for but one I didn’t expect to find so quiet. Do you get used to the quiet?

So now, there’s no baby growing, no baby feeding all day, no toddler to entertain. It’s all about me. Eeeek. All those things I haven’t done because I had no time or energy. All the things I’ve put off. All the things I have dreamed of doing. It’s their time. The first thing I am focussing on is getting a good work schedule. I have 15 hours a week. This should hopefully mean, along with a few evenings here and there we can reclaim our weekends as family time.

We have already decided we are making a board in the kitchen called the “Weekend List” . We are each going to pick something we want to do that weekend, from park trips, coffee stops, baking etc. It doesn’t even have to be anything big or grand but I just want to spend that time together at the weekends. It feels more precious than ever before.

The next thing I’m claiming is my body. I haven’t been happy with my body for the last 3 years, and while I am super proud of what it’s done and been through, it doesn’t feel like me at all. I want to feel fit again. I’ve started Couch to 5K and will do that 3 times a week with other workouts and getting in as many steps as I can. Moving makes me feel good. Oh gosh if you had told 13 year old Cathryn that, (who was traumatised by awful P.E lessons) she would laugh. But it’s true. Feeling myself again is important to me and now I have that time to make it happen before we try for another baby. We both want one more baby, we have been trying on and off for a while but with no luck. We’ve decided to put that on hold for a few months while I regain my fitness and come back to it later this year. After all, what’s the rush?

little girl bunches with white hair bows and daisy flowers in hair portrait photography

I’m also changing how I use Instagram and how I work. I’m no longer going to share loads of Behind the Scenes bits, a few edits etc but not the in-depth reels. That will all be going on my Patreon that I am opening back up. It will be just £5 a month. And each week I’ll upload photography tips, advice, behind the scenes, how I set things up, where to look for inspiration. I really enjoyed doing it before but I ran out of time. But now I’m opening it back up to the world with a rebrand and a new vibe! It’s going to be super exciting. All tutorial content will be there. My Instagram account will contain more pretty photos and videos. I want to make beautiful mini-films for reels rather than creating what I thought would be good. It’s going to be an extension of my photography aesthetic and I’m really excited about that. It’s a new project and challenge for me.

Eventually, I will write proper e-courses and I am getting back on my dream of writing a book. It’s going to happen now, there are no excuses. I also want to give my site a spruce up. It needs it. It’s been a long time hahah! This first week is all about finding my feet, trying to come up with a routine that feels good for me and incorporates everything I need it to. Hopefully, in a few weeks time, it will all feel natural and I’ll stop watching the clock! 

So, yeah. That’s my super rambly update. I’m excited about this new chapter, to see where it takes me. I hope you’ll stick along for the ride. 


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